Old Habits Die Hard (or Yes, I am very cheap)

Apple season is one of the many things I love about fall. A few weeks ago I had plans to applesauce with two crowds so I needed to go get my apples. I've been going to Wasem's Fruit Farm for as long as I can remember and I love it. As usual, the building smelled of donuts and cider, mmmmm. As I began picking drops (the ones that are on the ground), I realized that in my many years of going to Wasem's, I had never once picked apples from the trees. Not once!!

Growing up, we always picked drops (for those of you not familiar with cheap apple terminology, drops are apples that have already fallen to the ground). We would pick bushels and bushels and bushels of them. It was simple: drops are cheaper. We'd go home and turn them into quart upon quart of canned applesauce, sometimes with friends, sometimes on our own. We'd eat apples for weeks. We'd make and can apple pie filling. Mmmm apple season.

Of course, I remember in my childhood thinking how cool it would be to pick apples from the actual trees. Oooh ahhh. But look at me now. Apparently I can't shake the thriftiness and as I crouched under those apple trees, realizing that here in my thirties, I have yet to ever go to an orchard and just pick from the trees, I began questioning why I would even want to pick from the trees. Sure, some of the apples are a bit easier to reach.

But mostly, they are the same. Separated by such a short distance... and exactly half the price.

While picking, I did observe a few differences I should warn you about:

The slugs (although having never picked directly from the trees, maybe the tree apples have slugs too). I generally just flick them off the apple with a stick.

The mud- drops are definitely dirtier than tree apples. So you will have to wash your apples, which you were going to do anyway.

You do have to avoid these ones...

And there's the times you grab an apple that looks perfect and you turn it over to find this... ewww.

But honestly, the ones on the ground are just as good as the ones in the tree... and they are half the price!! Right. That's it in a nutshell: Drops are cheaper and just as good. Why would I ever pick them from the trees? Yeah, I might be beyond hope. And yes, I may be turning into my mother...

Living in Reality

A friend shared that she has been in counselling recently. Now this particular friend blows me away -- she is a classy, together, on time, gang busters, successful kind of gal, and for the second or third appointment in a row, she was late and pretty upset about it (so familiar). The counsellor decided to dig deeper. What was really going on here? Why was my friend late? She was in the middle of something and thought she could get 10 more minutes in on that project, check her mail, pay a bill and then drive 20 minutes across town, all in a half hour. Her counsellor told her: You aren't living in reality. Live in reality. If it takes 20 minutes to get across town, don't assume you can do it in 10 minutes. Live in reality.

My friend shared this a few weeks back and ever since it has been echoing in my own head. Live in reality Reenie.

Have you ever known people who are constantly posting all sorts of deep and meaningful quotes all over the interwebs, participating in fascinating discussions and debates over deep topics... and meanwhile, the house was literally falling apart around them? It makes it hard to take the philosophizing seriously, doesn't it? It makes you wonder where the rubber meets the road. Where does the philosophizing about a life one wants actually meet the life we are living? Are you living in reality? Am I??

Yeah, that's right, sometimes I'm that guy. Totally out of whack with reality and in need of a serious reality check.

In the absence of having my own children, my dogs are a good reminder to me when I am overdoing it. Suzie turns into the world's neediest critter when I haven't been home enough and Maggie begins eating the bathroom trash (or some other disgusting show of neglect). And it isn't just them! When I am overdoing it, I turn into the world's neediest critter myself. Suzie and her desperation for affection is nothing in comparison to the exhausted person living in my body, desperate for something but too tired to figure it out. Not to mention the villain in my head condemning my lack of progress, my inability to function, my ability to cry at the drop of a hat... Yeah, it might not be eating the bathroom trash, but it sure isn't pretty.

In the last few months, my life has been insane. Pedal to the metal insane. Emotional. Stressful. Grace filled. Crazy. And it is time to stop and take a deep breath. It is time to re-examine where I've lost touch with reality in my own life. In my own priorities.

So here's my reality check for today: Relaxation and taking time to unwind is an important part of life. Live in reality Reenie and stop trying to always accomplish more than is humanly possible and then beating yourself up over not being able to do it all. And consciously build in time to relax, to do something creative, to enjoy life!!

Do you need a reality check?

A tiny NO11 Victory

A couple weeks ago, at the Destination Wedding I've alluded to, I helped one of the bridesmaids alter her dress on the day before the wedding. Overall it went fine, it took awhile, but I thought the results were great. The main hitch was trying to hem the newly repaired sleeves with the matching, thick cotton quilting thread and it kept jamming my machine because of the stretchy, chiffon fabric. So I gave the dress back to the owner with a needle and thread and instructions to hand stitch those two little sleeve hems.

The next morning-- the day of the wedding-- as I was getting ready to head out to the hair appointment, she happened to mention that she hadn't found time to do the hems and would I like to do them for her. And... WAIT FOR IT...

"No, I won't have time either. If you must, find a sharp pair of sewing scissors, cut a very clean edge on the sleeves and let it go at that."

Booyah. NO11.

The Neighbor situation

I don't remember what you know about the neighbors. No, not Scott (neurotic man) but the new neighbors. Well, they moved in probably six weeks ago, bringing their super-social 8 year old boy Elijah. He's a very sweet kid but oh. my. gosh. he is beginning to get under my skin.

Now anyone who knows me knows I am a kid person. I love kids. I generally like them better than the adults. And of course, upon meeting Elijah, I thought he was delightful. Super chatty. Wanted to know all about the dogs. Why Suzie likes kids. Why Maggie doesn't. Why Suzie catches balls. Why Maggie doesn't. etc. I met his parents over the back fence while Elijah was talking my ear off. Mom: "He'll talk your ear off." Anyway, they seem like nice people. Mom cleans houses for a living. They have a cat (No Elijah, I don't have a cat.) Dad is a do-er and warned me that he'll probably mow my front yard sometimes, if that's okay. (The dogs usually just play in the yard when I mow the grass Elijah). So yeah, that's about all I know. Right, five minutes over the fence and regular waves from the car. Oh and dad smokes and grills in the carport, staring in my kitchen window, which is a little odd. Fine, but startling when you look out at dusk and realize your kitchen is the entertainment for time being. Odd.

About a month ago, I had the nieces and nephews for a visit (5 kids for the day) and Elijah was over for a good 7 hours straight. I made him check with his parents before coming over to the backyard and again when we moved the game inside. I declined his self-invitation to stay for dinner. It was strange to me that though the parents barely know me, they never checked in on him once. (Yes, apparently I will be a neurotic mom someday). They didn't peek over the back fence and call out a greeting or ask how it was going, and they seemed perfectly comfortable letting him play in my house for 2 hours (or longer if I hadn't sent him home.) And while I don't think I give off any sort of major creeper vibe... they don't know me!! No matter how many kids I had visiting that day!

Since then, he has come over fairly regularly to ask if the dogs can play. The problem is that I usually don't have time to supervise and I don't really trust Maggie alone with an unpredictable new kid. So sometimes I will let him kick the ball for Suze, but usually she just wants to come inside if I'm not out with her. Sigh. He told me a couple weeks back that "My dad said I'm not allowed to ask to come to people's houses. I have to wait to be invited." I smiled and said, "Oh, that's nice" but didn't invite him over since I was heading out shortly.

This Saturday was the day Elijah blew through my goodwill. I was trying to get stuff done- desperately- when the doorbell rang the first time, I had seen him cutting across the yard but was heading downstairs to do laundry, so I ignored it (even though he rang it a dozen times in a row). I was still downstairs working half an hour later when the doorbell started ringing over and over, again. Grrr. I ignored it again. All told, he came by 6 times while I was trying to get stuff done. I wasn't up for supervising so I continued to say no, the dogs weren't available to play and neither was I. 6 times!! Next time I will tell him to come back another day.

A friend joined me late afternoon and we headed out for awhile, and my unsuspecting, tired homie came home after work. The doorbell rang. Could the dogs play? She was too tired to fight it. Next thing she knew, he'd invited himself in and had toys out. And suddenly she found her tired self babysitting the neighbor's kid against her will. Sigh. When I got home she had an twinge of tired desperation in her voice "He won't go home!" I sent him home moments later, though of course, he was back half an hour later (in the middle of our dinner) and I had to send him away for the eighth time that day.

The next day, we let the dogs out, to find that someone had left our gate open (this is probably the 5th or 6th time this has happened since they moved in-despite my continual warnings to Elijah). Arrrggghhhh. Luckily the dogs don't run away, they just run around and then end up on the front porch. But they could get hit by a car. Or freak out the other neighbors. Or eat the cat we all hate that lives across the street. CLOSE THE GATE. Better yet, don't open it if I'm not standing with you.

So in my head I've been trying to figure out how to have this conversation with his parents without being unkind. It isn't that I dislike the kid, but I certainly can't / won't entertain him. Nor do I hope to have my doorbell ring 8 times in one day. And the gate! Good Lord the gate. We have got to have that gate closed. Think about the cat! The cars! The gate!

This morning I was running later than usual for work and the neighbor flagged me down. "I hope it's okay, but they are doing leaf pick up today so I'm going to finish raking your leaves! You know me, once I get going I like to just go!" Me: "Oh thank you." In head: "Argh!!" How does a person lay the smack down about a person's overly intrusive kid when the guy has now mowed the grass and raked the leaves.

And then tonight the second I pulled in the driveway he was over again, he'd signed for a UPS package for me. I think I may be stuck...

My life is awkward... Help?

Prayer Request

Please say a prayer in the next few days for my godson David and for his family. Wednesday there will be an important hearing in his adoption process and we are praying it goes smoothly and God's will be done! Got that? Wednesday. David. God. Here we go!

MLIA

You know you have those moments you realize just how blessed you are? This weekend has been full of those moments.

Wednesday night I was processing and posting pictures from last weekend's wedding which just reminded me of what a gift friendship is. I met Teresa in jr. high at girl's camp and we became friends for life. We have never lived in the same state, we aren't even particularly good at keeping in touch, and yet, we have a solid friendship that continues to stand the test of time and distance. God is good.

Thursday I had dinner with my friends Anne and Tim and their adorable munchkins. Although they live a whopping five minutes away, it is always entirely too long between visits. The kids are dear, and even remember, me which is impressive. And catching up and spending time with the whole family was just soooo great-- food for the soul.

Friday I connected with a friend via email, again, long overdue. And then I even left work a bit early because the new guy at work was buying the first round of beer. I work with great guys. There is a friendship and camaraderie, particularly among those of us in the office -- the daily grind-- and it was nice to hang out and to realize how blessed I am to work with people I like. So although there are a lot of things to work through in my job, I do love my guys.

From there I got in the car to meet friends for dinner and called my newest friend to chat. We met because we were both bridesmaids for our mutual friend Teresa. So I met the other two bridesmaids in September and seriously, they are some pretty awesome ladies. As we shared the joy and craziness of the wedding this past weekend, we were marvelling that a month ago we didn't know each other at all and now feel like we've been friends forever. What a gift. Anyway, so I called Kate to chat and catch up a bit. She's fabulous and I definitely wish she lived approximately 12 hours closer...

I arrived at my destination for dinner with some of my oldest and dearest friends. I have known both Amy and Sarah for as long as I can remember, and though we are separated by many miles and different life situations, we can always pick up where we left off and enjoy each other's company. Absolutely delightful! Not to mention the cute baby, the awesome husband, and fabulous Mexican food.

And then today I hung out with Sarah again, had dinner with Sarah and my awesome homie Jenny, and then talked with one of my other dearest long distance friends on the phone. I really don't know how I am so blessed. Oh there are struggles, there is heartbreak, there is pain. And yet, I choose to be thankful and in making the choice to be thankful, I am rewarded and built up and strengthened. God is good! I am so very blessed!

See what I mean? My life is awesome.